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# Et Tu, Caesar?!
- URL: https://dianaludwick.com/et-tu-caesar/
- Published: 2026-07-13T00:53:00.000Z
- Updated: 2026-10-24T20:06:57.000Z
- Description: “Et Tu, Caesar?!,” written Monday, July 13, poem 194 in a series of 365 poems written by Diana Ludwick in 2026. Photo: "Et Tu, Caesar?" by Diana Ludwick, (c) 2026.
- Author: Diana Ludwick
- Tags: 2026 Poetry Challenge, Current Events, Generational, Humor, Loosely Hinged, Poems, Pun-y / Tongue-in-Cheek, Betrayal, Bonne Maman, Caesar, Cyclops, Cyclospora, Devious, Dinglehopper, Dispatched, Empty Bonne Maman Jars, Et Tu Caesar?, Fishy, Good Jars, Heart, Homemade, July, Kingdom, Love Note, Marked Safe, Mercenaries, Ode, Origins, Outbreaks, Romaine, Ruffian, Sardinian, Single-celled Organisms, Summer, Terror, Trojan Horse, Worcestershire, #Migrated-1792872215677, #wp, #wp-post, #Import 2026-10-24 20:03

Just days ago, I waxed poetic  
about my deep affection   
for your creamy punch in the face,   
the Sardinian fishy fabulousness  
that spray of lemon   
that whoosh of Worcestershire  
like smelling salts to the nasal passage,  
your golden geometry   
of crisp toasts logged   
with molten tidal pools of butter   
and volcanic geysers of garlicky oil.  
How dare you betray me, Caesar.  
The audacity, the tragedy.  
Your reign of terror, to fall at your hand?  
So dark, so devious, that  
you brought with you  
a Trojan Horse  
so sticky and single-celled,   
and of such unspeakable origins,  
to my high summer table?   
Romaine, you ragged ruffian,  
how could you sever my trust  
like I dispatched your heart's core   
from your leafy kingdom?  
To think I write you an ode,   
a worldwide love note,   
and held you aloft,   
as a sterling silver   
dinglehopper-speared deity!   
And now, here, the hardest cruelty:  
I have to wait, and and wait and wait  
scanning the shores to see,  
have you bespited me  
with your Cyclops mercenaries,   
or will be be Marked Safe   
from your wine-dark waves of woe?  
And now, while I pucker and clench  
in anticipatory fear   
of the colonic clutches of Cyclospora,  
I must query:  
*Et tu, Caesar?*!  
  
***SHAME!*** 
***SHAME!*** 
***SHAME!***