> ## Content Index
> Fetch the complete content index at: https://dianaludwick.com/llms.txt
> Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further.

# String Theory
- URL: https://dianaludwick.com/string-theory/
- Published: 2026-03-03T22:02:01.000Z
- Updated: 2026-10-24T20:11:11.000Z
- Description: “String theory,” a rant about the inherent fickleness of children, written March 3, poem 062 in a series of 365 poems written by Diana Ludwick in 2026. Photo, “Unwanted Cheese,” by Diana Ludwick (c) 2026.
- Author: Diana Ludwick
- Tags: 2026 Poetry Challenge, Humor, Poems, Rants, Dairy, Groan-Inducing Moments, Kids, Mother Daughter Dynamics, parenting, Shopping, #Migrated-1792872215677, #wp, #wp-post, #Import 2026-10-24 20:03

Last week, I pushed the crotchety  
side-eye-wheeled shopping cart   
down the too-narrow   
slightly claustrophobic Dairy aisle  
at my local grocer’s.  
I dodged crouching employees  
stocking yoghurts and enormous  
vertical stacks of sour cream  
veering into my path   
like calcium-enriched icebergs.  
Meanwhile, my kid, unfazed   
by the chaos that laid before us  
had said “Mom! I need string cheese!”   
She grabbed the jumbo-sized bag  
stretching at the seams with what  
looked like 48 units of cheese  
— enough to feed two squealing  
classrooms of first graders.  
“Um." I begin.  
"Are you really sure you want this?  
You will really want to eat them all?  
You’ve complained in the past  
about cheese making your stomach  
feel 'sick and blah.'"  
"And I bought you 18   
mozzarella ball packets   
just over two weeks ago  
and you didn’t eat a single serving  
— not one! Before they expired.”   
She remained undeterred  
if anything her combative   
energies had been activated:  
“NO MOM!  
I LOVE CHEESE STICKS!   
I will OBVIOUSLY EAT THEM ALL.”  
So cut to this morning  
as I search for my ten a.m. snack  
and see 47 sticks left to go  
and she'd eaten that one on the  
car ride home from the store.  
String theory:   
you never have enough  
but always far too many  
burdensome batons  
of deeply desired yet  
duplicitously detested cheese.  
Now I'm off to ask generative AI   
if I can use my thirty-two pounds   
of cast-off cheese sticks   
like Halloumi; fry those sad dry logs  
in a pan of olive oil, then   
drizzle with honey and herbs  
And what to pair with this dish?  
Perhaps a glass of wine  
— and delicious silence.